Better all the time
I love it when faith begins to make sense--when God begins to create and reveal in you the things you felt were so far away, but now are coming true. It's not the things I wanted. Instead of activity he has given me solitude. Instead of someone to date, he's given me companions who cherish their singleness. I have a thorn in my side, loneliness. But is it really a thorn? I knew that one day I would begin to see it as a blessing. It's started today.
And maybe tomorrow I'll fall back into the trap again. But I'm just so grateful for everyone's prayers. I think that God has been encouraging me in many ways to seek him first. That idea seemed like a foreign to me, because I've always had spiritual friends and family that also walked with me in the Lord. Turning to them
was turning to God, because they'd help me see straight and pray over me in times of need. That season in my life is somehow over now. I don't live with my best friends, I live by myself...in an apartment complex filled with people that I don't know yet. I miss Lindsey. When I would have a bad day, I'd go and throw myself on her bed and spill the beans. And Lauren, because we'd always laugh at the same things. Kim would beat me up a lot, like a sister. And Allison, was always there when I'd come home, making some kind of craft on the living room floor. God gave me these amazing friends and now I have to be away from them. I can't even list all of my Skillman friends. It seems like I just got to feel closeness with them and I had to pack up and leave. This was totally my choice, I got exactly what I wanted. But still...
I don't know what will come out of this except strength. I can still use prayers because this is the fire, and I'll be here for some time. But I also know that many of you have experienced what it's like to live on your own in a new place before, or get a new job that wasn't easy. I delight in sharing your stories, because they are stories of victory. Mine will be, too.
(Lindsey, Lauren, Allison, and me.)
Check out my school pics!
Do I look like a teacher to you?
My vices
Some people take to drinking when they've had a hard day. I just eat the candy that I bought to reward my students.
I want to apologize for not speaking much "life" lately. When I wrote my teaching mission statement, one of my statements was, "I will speak life and not death, I will try to build up and not tear down." And of course, nobody's perfect. But I've got to try to hold to that. I told my sister that I didn't think anybody could see Jesus in me at school. Sometimes I'm just so disappointed that I forget to be thankful. This weekend, boring though it may be, has given me a lot of time to just think about who I am and what I started out trying to accomplish. It's a good thing that I'm directing again, because sometimes I feel like I lose theatre (my first love) in all this mess of "official school duties." You want me to tell you about some of the good stuff? The other day a student who had been especially difficult to deal with came to my room after school, just to hang out. He hasn't showed up to my class much in the past 6 weeks, because it's his goal to drop out of school. Other teachers say he's been trying to drop out since the 7th grade. I'm not sure if it means a lot to say he came by just to hang out, but the truth is, I've written him up four times and used up all of my energy trying to get him to do his work. The fact that he hasn't slashed my tires (he threatened to last week) is a sure sign that maybe he does care about school. Well, we'll see.
And have I told you? My students made me a beautiful collage using a poster from the show and real ticket stubs. They also used a scrap of the wallpaper from the set we built. It's one of the coolest gifts I've ever gotten.
And another happy ending! Remember my favorite jeans0--the ones covered in brown paint? Well, I bought some dark brown clothing dye and they came out so well, you can't even tell the paint from the rest of the jeans. My students gave me their seal of approval when they told me they now looked like "Emo Jeans". (Emo, I learned, is short for "emotional", and it's a rocker-thing.)
There will be more good stuff, and I'll try to report it. Hold me accountable, guys. I want to speak life, not death.
But expect me to vent when I'm covered in brown paint.
Have a wonderful weekend.
"
I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes in him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life." John 5:24
Bad Movie List
I'm trying to compile a list of the worst movies of all time. I consider this a valuable contribution to society. This way, your hard-earned money and precious time don't get wasted on a movie that will make you nauseated. Also, some people actually enjoy watching bad movies and find them sort of humorous. If you could think of just one to add to my list, it would be complete in no time. Here's what I've got so far.
--Grease 2: Possibly the worst music ever written. The hero saves the day by driving his motorcycle into a large, above-ground pool. Oooh! Daring!
--Frankie and Johnny: Here you can catch Elvis sporting a tight-fitting band uniform and singing about showboat gambling.
--The Core: If you watch it, you'll see that they tried to copy the movie Armageddon. Hillery Swank is in it, and she isn't even good.
--Dude, Where's My Car: I don't have to see a movie to know it stinks. I learn from the mistakes of others.
--Bedazzled: Unless you want to see Brendan Frazier dressed as a Columbian drug lord. Nah, didn't think so.
--Wagons East: This is Renee's Dad's favorite movie. My Dad would probably love it, too. But still....
Do you have any movies to add to my list? I'll publish them when it's done, and I'll credit you for your contribution to society.
I found this website dedicated to bad movies:
www.badmovies.org
A story Renee can't wait to tell!
I don't have anything funny. No--really. Ahhh wait. I DO have something funny. Renee and Jen spent the weekend with me, right? They are so nice, they came to see my show and spent a couple of days at my apartment and kept me company (which makes them high on my list of great friends). Anyway, we all slept in the same room because really, we may be 24 but slumber parties are still fun. And in the middle of the night, I supposedly screamed out something about school, waking up Renee. Apparently I was making some sort of strange sucking noise with the roof of my mouth. I just wanted to tell you all before Renee did, so I could beat her to the punch. She'll be telling you the story about how I made that sucking noise, and you can say,
"Renee, I already read that story on Heather's Blog."
Renee's gonna kill me. I know that, yet I have no fear.
I wrote two kids up last week at school and they put in their journals, in great big letters, TREAT PEOPLE WITH EQUALITY AND DON'T SHOW FAVORITISM! Because apparently punishing the students who misbehave and not the whole class is considered favoritism. Whatever. They still had to write those journals. What they say in them only makes me laugh a little bit.
The show this weekend was a great success. That's really all I want to say about that. It was such a struggle all around, and the stress of it was killer. I don't remember a time when I was more ready to get a show over and done with. It's like I have two jobs: Theatre teacher and regular, rule-abiding, copy-machine fixing, attendance taking teacher. One of those jobs gets neglected in times like these and, it isn't theatre.
In other news, my 18-year-old nephew Cole has a GIRLFRIEND. I don't know if I like her. I haven't met her yet. The odds really aren't in her favor as far as our family's concerned. I can just hear my sister saying, "She doesn't play any sports!"
Well, that's all I can think of to say right now. (Lucky for you!)
I love you all very much, and I think about you often.
Keep my family in your prayers.
Tainted by Paint
Here I sit, the lower right side of my body completely covered in brown paint. I might add, I'm wearing my favorite jeans, my new belt, and a new yellow shirt. Brown paint. I smell it. It's seeped into my skin by now, I just know it. Well, at least I'll have a tan. It's really depressing, being covered in brown paint. You should know that it was an accident, and only moments before, I was wearing coveralls, but I took them off...just in time to see two girls misbehaving. I tripped, looked down, and saw that the paint pan I was carrying had spilled its contents all over me. My students laughed at me. Can you believe it? How cruel. I guess I shouldn't wear anything that I really like to school because it will eventually get ruined by paint and sawdust in the scene shop.
What if the paint fumes cause brain damage?
You know, in moments like these it's nice to know that at least Jesus loves me.
That's ridic!
Life goes by so fast. Just think about how many seasons of Friends you watched! And before that, the Cosby show. Did you watch all of those seasons? You know the Cosby show is on Nick at Nite now. Do you know what "Emo" means? Me neither. Pretty soon we'll be on the fast track to oldsville.
Kim and I just got home from Lauren's wedding in Houston. (Yes, that's right. Hurricane Rita didn't destroy the chapel where she was getting married!) Never have I seen a more flawless wedding, relatively speaking of course. Nobody threw up, gave birth, split their dress, lost the rings, or punched the best man's lights out. All in all, it was a lovely experience, actually a lot of fun for everybody and not just the Bride's mother. (As is often the case because of long and boring slide shows.) I was so happy for them. And it was also great just to spend some time with my old friends and see how much we'd changed. Which brings me to ask anyone who reads this: Is it a good thing to want to be taken seriously? Because despite how silly I act, I always want to be taken seriously. I mean, who wants their thoughts and comments to be thought of as a joke...well...except when they are a joke. Ever been in the company of a person who takes everything you say seriously, never catching the humor you try to inject? That's no fun, is it? So which is better--to be taken seriously or not?
I think people take me seriously. Do you take me seriously? Wait--don't answer that!
The reason I bring it up is because I said something to my friend Kim on the way to Houston...something happened that caused me to declare, "That's ridic!" (You know, the word "ridiculous" shortened is "ridic". It's like slang that didn't catch on except with people like me who want their students to think they're cool.) Anyway, I said, "Oops! I said Ridic! How are you ever going to take me seriously when I say stuff like that!" And Kim said, "Why are you trying to make me take you seriously? Does it matter?"
I don't know! But until this mystery is solved, I'll keep using words like "ridic".
Peace out.
