Too Cool for School

The Blogginator

You can call me "The Constant Bloggener". I blog too much. But it's because I turned on my tv and there was the Bird Flu Death Movie. Not going to watch that! I was just thinking about Cole, my nephew who is sick. You don't understand how much I love this kid. He was born when I was six, and I wanted him to be my little brother. When he was three he got some mysterious disease that frightened us all but just turned out to be a rare but treatable disease. Then he ran into a telephone booth when he was six at a baseball game. He had to get stitches on his head. He played quarterback for his high school team, even though he has knees that didn't develop normally. He would come home after every game hurting and with ice packs on both knees. That didn't stop him from leading the team in rushing. As a child, he wouldn't wear shirts with buttons and he would entertain himself for hours by saying bathroom words to himself and then laughing. You'd be sitting in in the front seat of thea car and hear a little voice: "Poop!" (giggle giggle giggle), " Fart!" (giggle giggle). I have stories like this about all my nephews and nieces. And then my sister let me live with her for a summer so I could get a theatre job. I got my wish because Cole and Lindy were like my little siblings.
Kids are such a blessing. Some people, I believe, are afraid of having them because of the vast potential for loss. Did you watch Desperate Housewives last week? Bree, fed up with her son's truly devilish behavior, drove him to the middle of nowhere, abandoning him with a duffel bag full of clothing and an envelope with some money. She told him, "I just don't think I can be around you anymore." I'm not advocating that show or anything, it's just that every parent dreads their child either dying or making really horrible choices. Some days I want children; others I do not. A child means we die to self, because that’s what it takes to take care of this tiny, helpless creature. And we don’t want to die. Oh, but we do. We don’t like the way things are. We want to give love, not just receive it.
Anyway, Cole. I'm proud of him, no matter what he does, right or wrong. He's my make-believe little brother.

posted by Heather at 5/09/2006